Purposeful Serendipities

Often I’m waving a big flag in front of my friends’ faces letting them know that it’s ok for them to feel defeated and upset, but it’s either no crying or they have 1 opportunity for a “good cry” and then they have to keep going.

Funny how it’s so easy to give out advice, but even more hard to take your own advice, in the past few days I have found plenty life FU moments that has either given me the urge to cry or has actually made me cry in defeat. Cry of defeat, but it feels so good.

So when is it ok to shed a few tears for life adversities?!?!?!

Put out your pens and papers for my list of excused moments for the waterworks:

• Death in a family/friend/pet/hero/role model etc. . . (You cry over the death of your plant, I might have to beat you over the head with it).

• Loss of job/opportunity (You are only allowed to cry for 2 minutes for this one, because after your cry you will busy looking for ways to win and achieve better opportunities.

• Broken heart (I hate crying over an asshole or jerk, but guys are con-artist with the way they manipulate girls and their hearts [Girls are capable of this as well]. I came across a quote the other day stating that “women may fake orgasms, but men can fake a whole relationship!” Crying over a love is allowed because I would be mad to that I was deceived and I wasted time or loss a good catch over some dumb situation. Then again all is fair in love and basketball right?

• Severe wounds. Pain isn’t always love, if it hurts extremely cry for 1 minute then get over and take yourself to a hospital because tears does not heal anything.

** CELEBRATIONS ARE ALWAYS ALLOWED WATERWORKS, BECAUSE JOYOUS OCCASIONS SHOULD ALWAYS BE CELEBRATED! IF YOU GET THE URGE TO TEAR UP LET IT FLOW.

** HEALTHY PEOPLE CRY!!! UNHEALTHY PEOPLE PUT UP A FRONT!



Currently Crying LEAVE ME ALONE,

(OOOO, Hugs No Kisses)

The InExperienced Expert

What is up with finger happy people playing and raking their germ infested fingers in your locks whether they are real or fake?!?!?!? WTFFFF and a big F&*K Y@ to the touchy feely individual!

I have to guess their parents never taught them the etiquette of looking, but not touching. Often I find myself at work or at a social event, where a stranger or an associate may comment on my biweekly wig, weave, or maybe just my own hair, but yet they not only have to comment but they have to touch and feel the hair. I’m sorry what?!?!??! Like Hello ASSHOLE what are you going to do when my wig gets caught on your ring or for whatever reason remains in your hands rather than my head?!?!?

I’m the type of person who doesn’t like being touched regardless, so I could do without the extra feels of my “fa-real” (fake or real) hair.

Maybe it’s necessary to create buttons that people should wear to warn people you could look, but don’t touch. (DING!. . . I love technology!)

Browse below for my PSA buttons for the touchy happy assholes in the world. Purchase @ your own risk. (Insert Evil Laugh here)










Currently hiding my hair!!!

OOOO (No Kisses),

The InExperienced Expert

I love shopping, and I love a good buy. I love cute outfits, but I won’t be the one buying an atrocious outfit just because it graced the cover of vogue or went down the runway of Fashion Week in NYC. Give me a break, times are hard and we are in the middle of a recession. My favorite buys are A) Off the clearance rack or a good BOGO or B) Rainbows/Mandees/Forever 21/Charlotte Russe/LoveCulture etc . . C) Better yet the Internet.

The internet can you get you the best of the best without leaving your doorsteps. From premium brands to premium bootlegs. You do however have to be careful of illegitimate sites, hackers, sharing your information with 3rd party clients, or just overall leaving your identity opened to WHOLE WIDE WORD!!!

In this post, I decided to share the world of Sample Sale site online. This gives you the best of the bourgeoisie with pockets of the street vendor. If you know anything about sample sales you have to get there early to get the best finds, but with the perks of the internet you get to do it from the comfort of your own home without having to hit anyone over the head or to plan anything methodical to get the item you desire.

Here are exclusive invites (IT’S INVITE ONLY SO CLICK THE LINK) to a few sample sites that I shop from often:

• HauteLook

• Rue La La

• Ideeli

• Gilt Groupe

• Beyond the Rack

• Editor's Closet


Shop ‘Til You Drop,

OOOO (Hugs No Kisses)

The InExperienced Expert

This weekend I had the pleasure of attending a wedding, and I love getting dressed up so of course I went to town with a dress to wear and all the accessories. I guess its cultural differences because I looked like I was going to my prom and everyone else looked like they were going to a Sunday mass. I guess it’s a little different because in my family it’s important to get all dressed up for pics and to be up to par with the elegance of the ceremony.

Weddings are magical because you get to see family members you never typically get to see in a style and grace that you don’t get to see so often. My favorite parts are the words shared whether they are vows or just speeches of encouragement and support from the people that know the bride and the groom best.

Since 2010, I have seen a variety of weddings from Christian, BBQ/Pool Party Reception, 5 minute ceremony etc . . . the common factor of these weddings is they all end with the phrase “I DO”.

Do you promise to love and cherish her/him, in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better for worse, and forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her/him, for so long as you both shall live? "I do."


Do you together promise in the presence of your friends and family that you will at all times and in all circumstances, conduct yourselves toward one another as becomes Husband and Wife? "We do."


Do you together promise you will love, cherish and respect one another throughout the years? "We do."



Sound off: What’s your favorite part of weddings? Experience of wedding? Do you think we’re far from attending Virtual Weddings on the Computers?


Currently planning my fedding (Fake Wedding),

OOOO (Hugs No Kisses)

The Inexperienced Expert

I love a good headline. Today I came across one which read, “Sully who? JetBlue flight attendant Steven Slater becomes hero to wage earners everywhere” on the Ny Daily News Website. The article is about a fed-up flight attendant who cursed out a plane full of people after being disrespected and slid down the emergency slide of the plane with a beer in his hands, as he stood up for himself in maybe the most controversial way possible. It’s something that people often wish they could, even almost visualizing the scene, and practicing the speech they would say if they had that opportunity.

Myself included I used to have a manager who would get mad and throw things around rather than ask employees to fix shelves to a specific standard. Often I wanted to play dodgeball with her, catch some of the items and them peg her with them as I screamed “How do you like them apples?!?!”

Not a fan of violence, but sound off on some of your Hero Work Stories, where you stood up for someone in the office or stood up for yourself or your beliefs in some way.

Sucks when you’re cruising in your hoopty or dream car, and then all of sudden you hear a sound and bumps like your ride is no longer a smooth ride. As you’re driving a long through the bumps, thumping along hoping no one notices and hoping you don’t spin out or anything. You then begin to think of all of the things you needed to do to prevent the flat tire. The maintenance check up that you scheduled but didn’t go. The check engine light on that you saw but you ignored, and the sound tracks of your broken down car that you bopped your head to rather than listened closely to figure out what needs to be repaired first.


As you wait on the side of the road lookin’ like a three-legged sucker, you begin to get your tools out. Take out the jack, the tire iron, the spare. You begin to go to work. Jacking up the car to look at the damage, unloosening the lugs to prepare to take the tire off, and prepping the spare to put it back on your car to continue on your journey,

The title of my blog is Purposeful Serendipities for a reason. While looking up Flat Tire to help prepare for this particular post I came across the Edmund’s Guide to Changing a Flat Tire which stated, “Changing a flat tire is not a very pleasant experience. It seems like your car purposely tries to get a flat tire at the least opportune moments.”

Like this website stated you feel like the Gods of Luck are damning your every step, but in a weird serendipitous way it’s more a crude reminder of all that you need to do and accomplish to avoid flat tires and to get to your destination faster. It’s a process but on the rollercoaster of life the bittersweet moments are the ones that make you appreciate the things you often underestimate or look over. Moral of today’s post is to schedule your check-up, remember the tools you have available to you to help exploit your resources and to get from Point A to Point B content with your journey and the gas you wasted along the way.

I hate being dependent on people, but I also hate being on the road alone changing a flat tire. I appreciate the harsh reminder of promises I made to myself on my road to Success with my own place and my Acura/Infiniti/Audi but with a room full of loved ones. I guess you just have to take the good with the bad, and roll with the punches/flat tire.

Flat and our of air(just for a little bit :o/),

OOOO (Hugs No Kisses),

The InExperienced Expert

From time to time, I definitely want to recognize people, places, or things that put me in awe. The person, place or thing maybe a celebrity or it may be someone or something unknown like on a local aspect.

This week, I would like to focus on First Lady Michelle Obama. It’s been spoken about before, but Mrs. Obama is definitely doing her thing with her style, grace, elegant, and overall confidence. Sometimes I feel like she is more of the president than Barack Obama in the attention she commands. I hope her behind=the-door personality coincides with her media personality (meaning I hope she’s not a CAPITAL B-I-T-C-H because the way she walk around makes me wish she was my mom reading me a bed time story lol. She just seems that sweet and amazing).

Pics of the Amazing First Lady in Action:

It’s clear that Wyclef cares about Haiti, and will rally, support, and love his country in all their endeavors, but why now does he want to run for President. Haiti has been struggling for many years in the hands of poor and in adequate leaders even before the Earthquake, so where was Wyclef then? Where was his interest to run for President? In the eyes of a PR person, this is the best time to make such an announcement for the press and love of the fans on a more global aspect. Another question of mine is will he win because he’s Wyclef or will he win because he will get the job done? And I’m not talking about getting the job done through an A-List Rolodex contact base, but I’m talking about that Wyclef who will drop everything to go drag that body out from rubble. The Wyclef who will recognize the difference between the things that are possible and the things he will have to attempt to make possible. The Wyclef who will recognize the inexistent budget or a financial hole Haiti is in, and realize his resources are limited but the possibilities never endless.

My whole point, I think Wyclef running for President is crazy, but crazy is never bad if you can prove that you can get the job done, and know you’re doing it for the right reason. Haiti needs a real hero, not a celebrity politician who wants to win a title so they can go on various talk shows, post tweet messages every 5 seconds or have tweet contests with other celebrities, or who’s sitting in a completely different country watching their newly owned country fail miserably.

Idk what’s to come or what the other potential candidates may offer, but I hope they offer Haiti realities, hope, restore their faith, and preserve the history of Haiti. I hope when I’m watching TV to see the Paradise travel agent commercials with Haiti as the focal point. I want to be able to see and recognize My Haiti for it's hidden jewels, and I want to see a government focus on the growth of the country as a whole and not just a growth in position. I believe we're not too far from my dream.


Praying and Missing Haiti,

OOOO (Hugs No Kisses)
The InExperienced Expert

** PLEASE CONTINUE TO SUPPORT YÉLE & ANY OTHER FOUNDATION IN THE RECONSTRUCTION OF HAITI**

As I’m strutting through the halls of my office building, minding my own business every now and then I get a shout out for my shoes. I’m a shoe-a-holic so I can appreciate the feedback on my shoe game! Having a shoegasm in the store is the best feeling, especially when you continue to have that experience each time you wear those shoes.

Now I’m not crazy!!!! You may be thinking they are just shoes, but I’m going to need to set up the stage for you.

Guys: You’re sitting at a table in your own world, and then you hear the click and clacks of the heels you then proceed to look up and you see a woman in some nice stilettos, walking with an air of confidence that is so overwhelming you can’t even look away.

Ladies: Walk with me (Literally!). Think of your nicest pair of shoes, the one that each time you see you go damn these shoes are sexy all on their own, and then think about how you feel when you put them on your feet. (Yup, I hear it already. Ohhhhh Ahhhh!!!!!!)

I’m not going to lie, and say that pumps and stilettos are the most comfortable shoes in the world, because I will kick them bad boys off in a minute to put on some flats to chill in. But I love the way a pair of sexy heels make me feel. It’s like the entire attitude and confidence that the shoe possess, I begin to possess as well.

When I’m strutting in pumps, I feel taller and sexier. I guess more confident in the respect that with a fly ass pair of shoes, there is no denying How ”bad” I look.

I wonder if there’s a mental aspect to it?!?!? I mean when we put on rain boots or constructions boot, or raggedy ass sneakers does our personality or the way we feel about ourselves change accordingly. I mean I’m not expecting guys to walk around with heels on, so that they can feel sexier or confident but could it be we are what we walk in?!?!?

Let’s Play a Game: Sneakerality! – Look at pics A – H and let me know what each picture would make you feel like or how it would make you walk if you had them on your feet.















SOUND OFF: Please sound off if you have a Shoe Addiction, or if you feel that your shoes talk to you and alters your persona to some degree.

**For any further information on this topic google it, or click on the Psychology Today "The Psychology of Women - What is the Meaning of High Heels?"

Keep Strutting your stuff,
OOOO (Hugs No Kisses),

The InExperienced Expert

Lmfao while playing a game of "Google Search" (Don't ask, don't tell). I stumbled across an article on Expresspros.com entitled, "Job Search Struggles: The 10 People Who Don't Get Hired!". I couldn't help but laugh, and you'll see why as I break down their analysis.

1. The Inexperienced Expert – They claim to be an expert on a subject, but conversation and their job history reveal they have no real experience. This leaves experienced hiring managers unimpressed. (Funny how I make it to #1. . . This explains it all)


2. The Overly Persistent Inquirer –Repeatedly calling the interviewer to ask if a decision about the position has been made demonstrates this candidate’s lack of finesse and may cross the line into stalking. These are not the skills employers are looking for. (Yeah what happened to all those teachers and mentors who told me Persistence is Key and to never give up?!?!? Clearly they aren’t the ones getting promotions or hired according to this list)

3. The Flirt – Obviously more interested in landing a date with the interviewer than the job, the flirt is a walking HR disaster and a liability employers will quickly dismiss. Employers will quickly question the flirt’s ethics and professionalism. (I wish I could witness a flirt in an interview, probably hilarious. To be perfectly honest there's an office hoe in almost every office, so can someone please explain to me how she got hired?!?!? I'm not condoning it, but I'm just stating that in our sexualized culture how often is "The Flirst" kicked to the curb rather than being held as a company "perk).

4. The Liar – Lying about their education or experience to make themselves appear more qualified for the position makes an impression – a negative one that will hurt their long-term job search. (HELLO HAS ANYONE LOOKED OR LISTENED TO HALF OF THE CEOS AT THE TOP COMPANIES!!!! Let’s just say having a dad in a top place makes the lies look sweeter and less harmful!!! Again not condoning lying HR always find out the dirt and whatever they miss someone else will definitely put on blast!)

5. The HR Nightmare – They share too much personal information about their lifestyle choices, political views, or religious beliefs in every interview question, leaving employers bewildered and ready to move on to more thoughtful candidates. (I agree a Chatty Kathy in a workplace is bad for business, not only is she annoying but she’s cutting down production time!)

6. The Champion – Claiming in the interview they’ll outshine all current staff members is a turn off and an insult to a hiring manager’s sensibility and decision-making skills. (These "Champions" are not only annoying and cocky, but they are the first to fail or mess up on a group project. Kick Rocks you False Positive!)

7. The Overachiever – They can’t come up with a personal weakness to describe and talk about themselves as near super-human. This makes employers wonder if the candidate is just naïve, or worse, completely self-centered. (Everyone wants to be the overachiever, I don’t think anyone is going to walk into the office and say, “Well I easily get distracted!”, “I let my personal life interfere with my family life”, or even “I pretend to listen to people and do what I want in conclusion!” Let’s be real no one is perfect, but I don’t see anyone going to the office showing all the scars on the arm. I think it’s key to mention what you can do, what you expect to do, and what you will try your best to do. I’m no expert tho! LoL)

8. The Begger – With desperation, they beg the hiring manager to choose them because they’re tired of looking for a job. This leaves the hiring manager wondering about loyalty, competency, and common sense. ( Hello we’re in a recession, I’ll be begging for a job soon too!!! Help me, Help me Please! Lol seriously begging is a bad look makes you look weak in a place where you want to look strong!)

9. The Aggressor – Refusing to leave the interviewer’s office until they’re offered a job, the candidate’s aggressive behavior lands them an armed escort out of the building, rather than an invitation to start a new job. (Aggressiveness makes you the Office Bully I couldn’t agree more, and I hear Work Place Violence is on the rise, you don’t want to be the next face of America’s Most Wanted!)

10. The Casual Candidate – They dress inappropriately, show up late, and can’t provide specific answers to questions. This causes employers to question whether this is the candidate’s idea of a good impression and what they would act like in the office every day. (I agree why apply if you clearly just don’t give a F#C%! Go Home and Continue watching Maury!)

(Here's a link to the real article: Top 10 People Who don't get hired!)


OOOO (Hugs No Kisses),

The InExperienced Expert

Anyone who knows me knows that when I don’t eat, they might as well move out my way before I push them out of my way literally. PSA: Don’t mess with a girl who shopping on an empty stomach!!!!! COMPLY! COMPLY! COMPLY! j/k

Considering my many encounters with being Hangry, I decided to come up with Tips on dealing with Hangry People!

1. Don’t continue annoying them! If you know the thing that annoys them most, now would not be the time to test out how to piss them off the fastest.


2. If they ask you a question or for an opinion. Shit, you better provide some kind of valid feedback, better than “Whatever you think”.


3. Snacks and any other food you can swing their way to hold them over will win you major “Brownie Points”!


4. If you know they are a picky eater and don’t eat items (A-Z) try to remember their dislikes, rather than bringing up spots that you know is going to make them want to smack you.


5. If you know someone who is hangry, don’t continue to deprive them of food it will only get worse! (I’m speaking from experience, I am a frequent victim of food deprivation)


6. Don’t bring them around food you have no attention or buying or know that they cannot afford!


7. Make attempts to feed them to show you care or understand the situation at hand


8. Realize that their moods will fluctuate from happy, sad, to I want to kick your ass, They are not bi-polar just a little moody.


9. Refrain from making fun of how quick they devoured the food. They will be in a better mood, but don’t think that now that their stomach is full they won’t kick you ass!


10. Guys if you dealing with a woman, be understanding. Guys if you dealing with a man, pass him a stick of gum or whatever is in your pocket stale or not. (Guys typically eat anything!) Ladies if you are dealing with a woman (try to put down your bitch smacking hand and understand the hunger pains). Ladies if you are dealing with a guy who is hangry (remind him not to get out of line and that your trying to think of the quickest way to feed their belly)!

Lol, don’t take my tips to heart when your working with your Hangry Cry Baby, but just keep in mind how you would feel if you were super hungry with stomach pains, sitting in a traffic jam where you could see the restaurant you want to go eat at, but the congestion of traffic is preventing you from pulling in to that parking lot! Damn, just typing that I could feel the pain of that individual!

Until next time

OOOO (Hugs No Kisses),

The InExperienced Expert

In the age of technology, things are more often becoming digital than paper and pen. Since the beginning of my youth I have always felt the urge to express myself through paper and pen, through the use of doodles poetry, and even hate letters (that fortunately never were sent).

I don't know what it is about creating a blog, but it's something that I've been tossing around in my head for the past couple of weeks. I have little idea as to what I will blog about, but it's a journey worth exploring! I know at the end of beating on the keys of my keyboards you not only know more about who I am, but you will also learn a little about the world and the people around us.

To begin I decided to name this blog, Purposeful Serendipities. I don't mean to be like the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding", and travel through the root words and orgins, but I will take you on a trip with the smart guy Webster or more like FreeDictionary.com to explore the definitions of the two words.

Main Entry: pur•pose•ful

Pronunciation: \ˈpər-pəs-fəl\
Function: adjective
Date: 1853
1 : having a purpose: as a : MEANINGFUL b : INTENTIONAL
2 : full of determination

Main Entry: ser•en•dip•i•ty
Pronunciation: \-ˈdi-pə-tē\
Function: noun
Etymology: from its possession by the heroes of the Persian fairy tale The Three Princes of Serendip
Date: 1754
1 : the faculty or phenomenon of finding valuable or agreeable things not sought for

(Definitions taken from: Merriam-Webster Dictionary Online. Retrieved 8/3/10)


My point of exploring the definitions is because everything and anything talked about during our journey together even if not sought for will have meaning and serve purpose in one way or another. I’m a strong believer in things happening for a reason, so let the games begin!!!!


OOOO (Hugs No Kisses),
The InExperienced Expert